How this series started

Thank you so much for subscribing to follow my journey.

Let me begin by telling you how this series came to be.

Sometime in 2015 I had a first date with someone from a dating site.

He asked me how long I lived in Bradley Beach. I told him just a few months, one question lead to another and brought out a very different kind of story than we’re used to hearing.

“Where did you live before?” He asked me.

“East Rutherford” I told him.

“You have friends here? Family?”

“No, I don’t know anyone here.”

“Why did you choose to move here then? Work?”

“No, I always wanted to live by the beach, when I sold my house I thought it was the perfect time to give it a try. Plus, I’ve never lived alone before, so I thought getting some distance was a good idea too.”

“Do you have kids?”

“Yeah, I have 5 kids, they are all grown up now.”

“How old were you when you had your first?”

“I was 19, and I was born the 8th child of 8 children, so I’ve literally never lived alone a day before I moved here.”

“Were you afraid?”

“Yes, I cried every time I took the hour drive down to look at apartments, and all the way home too.”

“Why did you do it then?”

“Because I didn’t want to give in to fear. I knew there was nothing to be afraid of. What could happen?! But I was so afraid anyway. I was afraid I was doing something wrong, something I would regret, I was afraid I would hate being alone… I was afraid I was making a mistake selling my house. I can’t even tell you how it felt. It was dark, that’s the best way to describe it. It was like I was 2 people, I’m glad that the stronger one was the one that moved here.”

Note: I think it was because I knew, if I didn’t do it, it would be way worse than the regret of never knowing what it would have been like if I did. I couldn’t allow myself to live with never knowing…

“You commute all that way back there?”

“No, I work from home. I started a business after I got divorced and am able to live off of it for the first time this year.”

“Wow, that’s impressive! What’s your business?”

“I help people get organized, but I never actually see anyone who pays me to help them.”

He looked at me with this look of confusion, amazement and wonder…

“You need to write a blog!” He told me kinda shocked that I hadn’t thought of it myself…

When I told him, that blogging was a big part of my business yet still I had never written about the process I was going through… well… you should have seen his face!

With that conversation I decided to start writing about it.

I soon dropped it though… I tried to keep it up, doing one here and there…

I don’t know if it was the overwhelm of it all, you have to figure I was still new at it, afraid a lot of the time, I always felt like I was treading water.

I didn’t have anyone else to look at that had done what I was doing to see if I was doing it right… I guess I wasn’t willing to show all that I had to show in real time… There were… and are lots of ups but plenty of downs, who wants to show their vulnerabilities? When the downs came, I was so low sometimes I could hardly believe it. I will go into what triggered those really low times later in the series.

Another thing too was I kept asking myself “Who really gave a crap about what I was doing anyway?”

So, having said all of that… Fast forward 2-plus years and I’ve decided that it’s time to begin this again and this time keep it up.

Since I’ve done some videos that were directly for this message there will be some backtracking and hopefully I’ll piece together a story from the last 2 plus years since I sold my house to today and after.

Some present day will be mixed into it. Hopefully all of it will make sense and help me as I move ahead and help you to break free from the status quo and play by the new rules that life has thrust upon us women of today.

I really look forward to hearing from you and share in your journey as well.

Love,
Kathy

Leave a Reply 4 comments

Paula - Reply

Hi Kathy!
Im so glad to see you again and begin hearing about your journey. I started following you well, i hadnt realized its been 2 yrs. now! I could tell even before you let us know about your move that there was must more going on.
I am anxious to hear more of your story. There is something very genuine in the in the way you tell your story. Just like the “real life” way you help us organize our things. It sets you apart from any other you tubers and bloggers i follow.
You see, i am 59, divorced and after that i survived an abusive relationship for 8 yrs. It changed me. Although i have been out of that for many years i had children to take care of and have just hung in there, with depression. Ptsd and add. Currently, my kids have moved out and i must find a smaller apt. Even though i feel this should be a positive time in my life and sort of look forward to a new place. I feel stuck with no motivation. Im not getting up and doing anything etc. Its crazy lol. Its paulas time to shine but i feel dull.
Watching this first video has given me a little spark. I heard your anxiety or fear in your voice because i experience the same thing only i dont know how to push thru it when i should. It only comes to me at the very last minute before something happens. I want to let you know what a brave soul you are and im hoping to learn somethings from you along this road. Thank you Kathy for your courage to put yourself out there for yourself and for all of us who feel your spark. Thank you for being the strong one that cares enough to boldly give all of yourself to help others. I cant wait to get some life back in me so i can give my kids a real glimpse of who there mom really is.
Sincerely. Your admirer paula

    Kathy Robers - Reply

    Darlig girl, you got this. I know that there are many days and nights that you feel afraid. And the depression is only the old you trying to keep you safe. It knows that you are OK there. Even if you aren’t thriving… Our body just wants safety. BUT our spirt wants to fly like an eagle. Our spirit has no fear, Our spirit remembers God when we were still in the womb and it is your spirit that you must feed. Do your best to stay away from gossip and negative people and tv shows that are not empowering and are filled with drama.

    Make yourelf always feel amazing and don’t be afraid of the curve balls and the hurdles. because only those on the road hits the bumps. Being on the sidelines may be safe, but it sure aint living.

    I love what you said: “I cant wait to get some life back in me so i can give my kids a real glimpse of who there mom really is.” Show ’em mom… freaking show ’em!

Susan McLaughlin - Reply

Kathy thank you for this . I’m 68 and just beginning to make a plan. Don’t know where the time went. I’m sure I’m still 30.
So I’m happy to travel along with you as we find our new paths in life.

    Kathy Robers - Reply

    Hi Susan, so sorry for the late reply! We are still 30 between our ears. It’s not till we look in the mirror do we realize it. Its a new way of thinking that we need, because our grandmothers ways will not serve us in this day and age, it didn’t serve them. But it’s still different for us now. We have things available to us that our grandmothers couldn’t even dream of. Thanks for the comment Susan xxoo

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