Thank you so much for subscribing to follow my journey.
Let me begin by telling you how this series came to be.
Sometime in 2015 I had a first date with someone from a dating site.
He asked me how long I lived in Bradley Beach. I told him just a few months, one question lead to another and brought out a very different kind of story than we’re used to hearing.
“Where did you live before?” He asked me.
“East Rutherford” I told him.
“You have friends here? Family?”
“No, I don’t know anyone here.”
“Why did you choose to move here then? Work?”
“No, I always wanted to live by the beach, when I sold my house I thought it was the perfect time to give it a try. Plus, I’ve never lived alone before, so I thought getting some distance was a good idea too.”
“Do you have kids?”
“Yeah, I have 5 kids, they are all grown up now.”
“How old were you when you had your first?”
“I was 19, and I was born the 8th child of 8 children, so I’ve literally never lived alone a day before I moved here.”
“Were you afraid?”
“Yes, I cried every time I took the hour drive down to look at apartments, and all the way home too.”
“Why did you do it then?”
“Because I didn’t want to give in to fear. I knew there was nothing to be afraid of. What could happen?! But I was so afraid anyway. I was afraid I was doing something wrong, something I would regret, I was afraid I would hate being alone… I was afraid I was making a mistake selling my house. I can’t even tell you how it felt. It was dark, that’s the best way to describe it. It was like I was 2 people, I’m glad that the stronger one was the one that moved here.”
Note: I think it was because I knew, if I didn’t do it, it would be way worse than the regret of never knowing what it would have been like if I did. I couldn’t allow myself to live with never knowing…
“You commute all that way back there?”
“No, I work from home. I started a business after I got divorced and am able to live off of it for the first time this year.”
“Wow, that’s impressive! What’s your business?”
“I help people get organized, but I never actually see anyone who pays me to help them.”
He looked at me with this look of confusion, amazement and wonder…
“You need to write a blog!” He told me kinda shocked that I hadn’t thought of it myself…
When I told him, that blogging was a big part of my business yet still I had never written about the process I was going through… well… you should have seen his face!
With that conversation I decided to start writing about it.
I soon dropped it though… I tried to keep it up, doing one here and there…
I don’t know if it was the overwhelm of it all, you have to figure I was still new at it, afraid a lot of the time, I always felt like I was treading water.
I didn’t have anyone else to look at that had done what I was doing to see if I was doing it right… I guess I wasn’t willing to show all that I had to show in real time… There were… and are lots of ups but plenty of downs, who wants to show their vulnerabilities? When the downs came, I was so low sometimes I could hardly believe it. I will go into what triggered those really low times later in the series.
Another thing too was I kept asking myself “Who really gave a crap about what I was doing anyway?”
So, having said all of that… Fast forward 2-plus years and I’ve decided that it’s time to begin this again and this time keep it up.
Since I’ve done some videos that were directly for this message there will be some backtracking and hopefully I’ll piece together a story from the last 2 plus years since I sold my house to today and after.
Some present day will be mixed into it. Hopefully all of it will make sense and help me as I move ahead and help you to break free from the status quo and play by the new rules that life has thrust upon us women of today.
I really look forward to hearing from you and share in your journey as well.